||: To this day, I recall so clearly the desperation I felt at that very moment. The moment when I realized that everything I had invested my life in was slipping like quicksand from my grip. And it was slipping without my permission. If not for the Sovereign Lord, the darkness would have consumed me. .
I was on my way back to school, ready to get back after a week of doctors appointments. The phone rang and I just had a gut feeling that something wasn’t right. My mother answered and I could see the color drain from her when the news came. She reached back to hold my hand, reassurance, I felt as long as I didn’t let go of her hand I wouldn’t have to hear the news I knew would crush me. She said the words every person fears the most. Lord, where are You? The tears rolled down my cheeks as I inquired of Him. The God of all creation, full of goodness, faithfulness and sovereignty, seemed so far away. Yet, there was one thing I knew for certain: God was still with me. No, I could not see Him or sense Him. But I held on to the hope that knowing Christ had instilled in me: that I could go nowhere from His presence, His care, or His abundant grace even when I felt utterly, desperately weak and broken. Somehow, in the most ironic way and despite everything falling apart, my confidence in God deepened.
You may be asking, “How is that possible?” If you do not yet know Jesus Christ, I am here to assure you—it is possible, indeed. It is more than possible, in fact, to have everything falling to pieces around you and yet still to rest in the security and strength of the Lord. However, the keys to building confidence cannot be sought and found in earthly solutions, remedies, religions and mantras—but only in realizing our weakness, trusting the Lord’s sole sufficiency, and finding our hope in Him.:||